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Author Topic: Melodeon Limericks  (Read 71364 times)

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pikey

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #100 on: October 24, 2012, 09:51:32 PM »

Re: "2 voice Octave boxes - Opinions saught."

Trials of a West Riding melodeon purveyor
(to be recited in broad Yorkshire)

English spelling wi' problems is fraught
So when Jon says opinions are "saught"
Uz pedants will say
Schooling fails t'young today
Ee mun play by ear - what a thought!

Now, it's not that young Jon's illiterate
But his brain has too fast a bit-rate
Like all Yorkshire fellows
A-squeezing of bellows
Keyboard speed matches 'is witter-rate!

Excusez-la!

champion!
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Still squeezing after all these years.
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Nick Collis Bird

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #101 on: October 26, 2012, 12:03:28 PM »

There was a young fellow from Eton
Who bought a new box from Cleckheaton
He was so chuffed to bits he could play many hits
his wife gave him a sharp beating


Oh dear Oh dear, I give up
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Has anyone heard of the song. “ Broken Alarm-clock Blues” ? It starts   “I woke up this Afternoon”

pikey

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #102 on: October 26, 2012, 03:38:58 PM »

 :D
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langleymick

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #103 on: October 27, 2012, 09:13:15 AM »

Why not try iambic pentameter or something for a change
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pikey

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #104 on: October 27, 2012, 12:03:17 PM »

Are they in D or G ?  ;D


I'm confused, as confused as can be
trying to play an odd key
Is it E or Fb?
F# or Gb?
or shall I just play B# / C ?

 >:E
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Still squeezing after all these years.
Mostly on hohners , with a couple of Dinos and a smattering of anglos - and now a Jeffries duet

Nick Collis Bird

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #105 on: October 27, 2012, 02:26:55 PM »

Now that really is Brill.
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Has anyone heard of the song. “ Broken Alarm-clock Blues” ? It starts   “I woke up this Afternoon”

Nick Collis Bird

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #106 on: October 27, 2012, 02:39:15 PM »

The key that you play in means nowt
And if ever you are in doubt
Just get a big stick and listen to Nick
To prove music's gone right up the spout
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Has anyone heard of the song. “ Broken Alarm-clock Blues” ? It starts   “I woke up this Afternoon”

Nick Collis Bird

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #107 on: October 27, 2012, 04:26:38 PM »

I'm tied of the Dino Baffetti
Me fingers have turned to spaghetti
And adding to that my tummy is fat
My brain seems so full of confetti.


OK gang, beat that one.
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Has anyone heard of the song. “ Broken Alarm-clock Blues” ? It starts   “I woke up this Afternoon”

pikey

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #108 on: October 27, 2012, 05:09:34 PM »

 >:E

Nice one.

As one pencil said to the other,

"2B or not 2B, that is the question"

 ;D

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Still squeezing after all these years.
Mostly on hohners , with a couple of Dinos and a smattering of anglos - and now a Jeffries duet

pikey

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #109 on: October 27, 2012, 05:20:29 PM »

I wander'd lonely as a cloud
That floats on high o'er hills and butts,
When all at once I saw a crowd,
A host, of golden Lilliputs;

Beside the lake, beneath the trees,
Fluttering and dancing and played by Rees.
Continuous as the stars that shine

And twinkle just like big John K,
They stretch'd in never-ending line
Along the margins of eBay:

Ten thousand saw I at a glance,
Tossing their levers in sprightly dance.
The reeds inside them danced; but they

Out-did the sparkling Tommys in glee:
A Melnetter could not but go play,
In such a jocund company:

I gazed -- and gazed -- but little thought
What tunes the show to me had brought:

For oft, when on TOTM I lie
In vacant or in pensive mood,
They flash upon that inward eye
Which is the bliss of solitude;

And then my heart with pleasure spurts,
And dances with the Pokerworks.


After Wordsworth  >:E
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Still squeezing after all these years.
Mostly on hohners , with a couple of Dinos and a smattering of anglos - and now a Jeffries duet

Nick Collis Bird

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #110 on: October 27, 2012, 07:06:19 PM »

You have really got me there Pikey.
   The only reply I can think of is courtesy of Capstick.
" I wandered lonely as a cloud
That floats on high oe'r dales and banks
I stepped upon a man's bare ar.se
And heard a woman's voice cry "thanks!". "
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Has anyone heard of the song. “ Broken Alarm-clock Blues” ? It starts   “I woke up this Afternoon”

george garside

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #111 on: October 27, 2012, 10:04:13 PM »

hahahahuh!
g >:E ;D
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Nick Collis Bird

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #112 on: October 28, 2012, 11:24:13 AM »

Have to go back to London today
The wages I really must pay
The Baffetti is here the FR18 there
I DO feel a little bit queer
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Has anyone heard of the song. “ Broken Alarm-clock Blues” ? It starts   “I woke up this Afternoon”

george garside

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #113 on: October 28, 2012, 11:11:38 PM »

There was a three  row player of this land
who sounded exactly like Jimmy Shand
He strutted his stuff
with a great deal of bluff

But one day on the stage
the audience he did amaze
as with fear in his expression
the tune made a sudden regression!

His bluff it was called
as the tune backwards hauled
for only four buttons were of the working kind
start, stop, fast forward and rewind!

george
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Nick Collis Bird

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #114 on: October 29, 2012, 02:14:06 PM »

George?
Is that a P...take of my FR18?
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Has anyone heard of the song. “ Broken Alarm-clock Blues” ? It starts   “I woke up this Afternoon”

george garside

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #115 on: October 29, 2012, 02:39:04 PM »

the thought never entered my head - but if the cap fits etc, who am I to argue!

george ;)
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Nick Collis Bird

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #116 on: October 29, 2012, 04:49:54 PM »

Ouch!
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Stiamh

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #117 on: October 30, 2012, 03:26:01 PM »

(with apologies to Stanley Holloway)

Now there's a famous accordion maker called Hohner
That's noted for double-ray fun
And Mr (and Mrs?) Rowbotham
Fettled one for me and my son

Now a handsome box were yon blackDot
All declacked to the best, quite a swell
Wi' a twenty-two button special keyboard
The finest that no maker could sell

Now people with big red sopranis
may say buttons is fiddlin and small
but the speed and response and the tone
are nothin' to laugh at, at all

I were at a session t'other day in fair Knowlton
Now I know dropping names is a sin
But I showed blackdot to't lad next to me
A fine Irishman named Mart-in

I won't play nothing save Hohners
Says he, wi' a serious look
Not Paolos, not Castis, nor Saltrells
Can match 'em for 'owt in my book. 

So if it's a grand box you are wanting
Get on t'blower and talk to the men
Who know all about souping up Hohners:
Mike Rowbotham or yon Martin - Quinn!

Nick Collis Bird

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #118 on: October 30, 2012, 05:19:34 PM »

Now THAT really is brilliant Steve. However it should be with apologies to Marriott Edgar who wrote all of those "poems"? Which Stanley Holloway performed so well.
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Has anyone heard of the song. “ Broken Alarm-clock Blues” ? It starts   “I woke up this Afternoon”

pikey

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #119 on: October 30, 2012, 07:11:57 PM »

Champion!  :D
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Still squeezing after all these years.
Mostly on hohners , with a couple of Dinos and a smattering of anglos - and now a Jeffries duet
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