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Author Topic: Melodeon Limericks  (Read 71362 times)

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Anahata

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #460 on: October 02, 2013, 10:32:25 PM »

I like the last line. "Anahata" is the heart chakra in Hindu and Buddhist traditions...

For the record, my name doesn't properly rhyme with "smarter"  ;)
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pikey

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #461 on: October 02, 2013, 10:55:03 PM »

I like the last line. "Anahata" is the heart chakra in Hindu and Buddhist traditions...

For the record, my name doesn't properly rhyme with "smarter"  ;)

 ;) it does if you use the George Osborne pronunciation handbook  ;)
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Still squeezing after all these years.
Mostly on hohners , with a couple of Dinos and a smattering of anglos - and now a Jeffries duet

pikey

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #462 on: October 02, 2013, 11:06:54 PM »

Merodeon praying's a must
When tlying to enrarge your bust
Keep squeezing the berrows
To impless your ferrows
Just watch for the inclease in rust


Note: most of the letters l and r have been transposed so as not to upset those with a sensitive disposition

 >:E
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Still squeezing after all these years.
Mostly on hohners , with a couple of Dinos and a smattering of anglos - and now a Jeffries duet

Nick Collis Bird

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #463 on: October 03, 2013, 09:50:45 AM »

Merodeon praying's a must
When tlying to enrarge your bust
Keep squeezing the berrows
To impless your ferrows
Just watch for the inclease in rust


Note: most of the letters l and r have been transposed so as not to upset those with a sensitive disposition

That's a direct rip-off from a Chinese advert for a Chanson. >:(

 >:E
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Has anyone heard of the song. “ Broken Alarm-clock Blues” ? It starts   “I woke up this Afternoon”

pikey

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #464 on: October 07, 2013, 10:05:51 AM »

reminds me of an old chinese mate of mine, Tony Liu,  who came to work one day singing the praises of a TV show he'd seen the night before, the Ken Everest show.

It took us ages to work out who he really meant, which was of course in the best possible taste.....   ;)

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Still squeezing after all these years.
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Nick Collis Bird

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #465 on: October 07, 2013, 05:02:37 PM »

It appears that a thread drift's afoot
With Eastern connotations to boot
But let's tell you this, not taking the piss
That the Chanson, when tweaked, is a hoot !
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Has anyone heard of the song. “ Broken Alarm-clock Blues” ? It starts   “I woke up this Afternoon”

Nick Collis Bird

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #466 on: October 08, 2013, 09:54:13 PM »

It suddenly occurred just to me
That to take a fine squeezebox to sea
Is not only mad, but exceptionally bad
If on it Captain Bligh had a wee.
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Has anyone heard of the song. “ Broken Alarm-clock Blues” ? It starts   “I woke up this Afternoon”

pikey

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #467 on: October 08, 2013, 11:11:44 PM »

 ;)

So some of you like a reversal,
the dutch one, not one that's more pers'nal;
a type of perversion,
with rectal insertion
of an Erica, inserted longitud'nal 

 >:E
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Still squeezing after all these years.
Mostly on hohners , with a couple of Dinos and a smattering of anglos - and now a Jeffries duet

pikey

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #468 on: October 08, 2013, 11:13:57 PM »


So now I can play in Bb
To Hohner I take off my hat
and give dues to our Nick
I've got a new trick
I can play a duet with our cat

 ;)
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Still squeezing after all these years.
Mostly on hohners , with a couple of Dinos and a smattering of anglos - and now a Jeffries duet

Nick Collis Bird

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #469 on: October 09, 2013, 07:09:01 AM »

 ;D
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Has anyone heard of the song. “ Broken Alarm-clock Blues” ? It starts   “I woke up this Afternoon”

Etienne

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #470 on: October 09, 2013, 10:02:48 AM »

Can't stop laughing...
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pikey

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #471 on: October 09, 2013, 12:14:26 PM »

 >:E

If your bellows are tending to slap
when you pull them apart with a gap
although it seems rude
please don't play in the nude
or else you might hurt your old chap

 >:E   :||:   :|bl
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Still squeezing after all these years.
Mostly on hohners , with a couple of Dinos and a smattering of anglos - and now a Jeffries duet

Nick Collis Bird

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #472 on: October 10, 2013, 09:43:50 AM »

Too late!  :o
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Has anyone heard of the song. “ Broken Alarm-clock Blues” ? It starts   “I woke up this Afternoon”

pikey

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #473 on: October 10, 2013, 01:27:20 PM »

If your willy is stuck in a valve
And your missus does not want to delve
To get it unstuck
You'll need lots of luck
Warm oil, a spoon, and some salve


 >:E
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Still squeezing after all these years.
Mostly on hohners , with a couple of Dinos and a smattering of anglos - and now a Jeffries duet

Anahata

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #474 on: October 10, 2013, 01:47:57 PM »

If your willy is stuck in a valve
And your missus does not want to delve
To get it unstuck
You'll need lots of luck
Warm oil, a spoon, and some salve

"Don't ask me how I know this..."
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I'm a melodeon player. What's your excuse?
Music recording and web hosting: www.treewind.co.uk
Mary Humphreys and Anahata: www.maryanahata.co.uk
Ceilidh band: www.barleycoteband.co.uk

pikey

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #475 on: October 10, 2013, 02:26:38 PM »

Thanks to all who have posted and enjoyed, it's now time to close the thread.

ta

Pikey
« Last Edit: October 10, 2013, 08:23:18 PM by Theo »
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Still squeezing after all these years.
Mostly on hohners , with a couple of Dinos and a smattering of anglos - and now a Jeffries duet

Theo

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Re: Melodeon Limericks
« Reply #476 on: October 10, 2013, 08:18:02 PM »

THEO! It's got to be said
Could you please put an end to this thread.
The  poems have been great but is it never too late
To do something productive instead?


Better late than never!
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