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Author Topic: Friendly sessions  (Read 4682 times)

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Kevbox

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Friendly sessions
« on: February 05, 2013, 09:59:30 AM »

Hi all, I just wanted to put this topic out there (friendly sessions) I find it quite sad and disturbing that when people ask where there might be a session they put , is it friendly ? just wondered why on earth it wouldn't be ? music is all about sharing and giving, that's why we do it no ? any feedback more than welcome, btw this is a (friendly) discussion.
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Bob Ellis

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Re: Friendly sessions
« Reply #1 on: February 05, 2013, 10:41:23 AM »

Most of the sessions I have attended over the years have been friendly and welcoming, but I can think of three that weren't. There are a couple of people who are regulars in The Elsinore during Whitby Folk Week who are habitually rude and offensive, so I don't go in there any more, except for the melnet session, of course, which they don't attend, not being melodeon players.

Then there was the session in Harrogate where they have a booklet of tunes. On my only visit, when I played anything that wasn't in their booklet, it was met with stony silence. As I was leaving, I was told that they hoped I would come again but that I should get a copy of their tune book and learn the tunes in it before returning. I declined politiely on the grounds that I doubted whether I would be attending that session again.

The third one was a mixed song and tune session in which the idea was that songs and tunes would alternate. However, it seemed that the singers were conspiring to drive the musicians away. As the last note of one song was being sung, someone else would jump in with another one, leaving no room for the musicians. It worked! We went somewhere else and started our own tune session.
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Theo

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Re: Friendly sessions
« Reply #2 on: February 05, 2013, 10:48:33 AM »

Hi all, I just wanted to put this topic out there (friendly sessions) I find it quite sad and disturbing that when people ask where there might be a session they put , is it friendly ? just wondered why on earth it wouldn't be ? music is all about sharing and giving, that's why we do it no ? any feedback more than welcome, btw this is a (friendly) discussion.

Treat going to a session as you would any other social occasion where you are a stranger and you will more than likely get on.   Don't just go to a new session and start playing straight off. Take time to speak to the people there, listen to the conversation, listen to the music and get a feel for how things are.  If you get the feeling that it's like the ones that Bob has described, then it's usually best just to leave and do something else!   But mostly if you engage with the people first you will get on well.
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Theo Gibb - Gateshead UK

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Mike Carney

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Re: Friendly sessions
« Reply #3 on: February 05, 2013, 11:58:12 AM »

Most of the sessions I have attended over the years have been friendly and welcoming, but I can think of three that weren't.

Hi folks.  I must say that this strikes a chord for me, but to pick up Theo's comment re working out what the prevailing style of the regulars is, I think I am learning that sessions can be very different in structure, style, customs etc.  I did have a poor experience at a pub in Whitby during folk week, but it was a very small bar... and it seemed people had been in there all afternoon so were a little the worse for wear. I think it is a question of trying to find a session that feels right for you and if it doesn't, move on.
Mike  :||:
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deltasalmon

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Re: Friendly sessions
« Reply #4 on: February 05, 2013, 12:46:59 PM »

Usually when attending a new session I don't even bring my instrument. I'll go just to listen to the music and meet the people there. If it seems like a good one then I'll come back next time with my instrument.

But more to the point of the OP. Different people have different ideas on what a session is.
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Graham Spencer

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Re: Friendly sessions
« Reply #5 on: February 05, 2013, 01:26:55 PM »

It'a while since I was at a UK session as I haven't lived there for about 6 years, but the best ones I remember going to were ones with someone definitely in charge and setting the procedure - not ruling with a rod of iron, but making sure that everyone is aware of the protocol and, in a friendly but firm way, ensuring it's adhered to (thus, all other things being equal, avoiding the singers' mafia mentioned above and, with luck, tempering the unsociability described at what would seem to have been free-for-all affairs).  Players, and therefore sessions, are thin on the ground here in Cyprus, and such sessions as we can hold tend to consist of a very eclectic mix of music - no problem with that - and all are run with a definite "leader" who will thank the last contributor and invite the next to play something. Works well here.  The one with a set tune book sounds awful - I wouldn't want anything to do with a setup like that!

Graham
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Re: Friendly sessions
« Reply #6 on: February 05, 2013, 02:13:58 PM »

Most of the sessions I have attended over the years have been friendly and welcoming, but I can think of three that weren't. There are a couple of people who are regulars in The Elsinore during Whitby Folk Week who are habitually rude and offensive, so I don't go in there any more, except for the melnet session, of course, which they don't attend, not being melodeon players.


    ;D even the Elsinore's usual 'Tuesday Folk' musicians/singers go elsewhere during Folk Week    ;) .... however the rest of the year Tony and Angie Maher, who run the session (tunes/songs/comic monologues .. ) make sure everyone is most welcome ..... including a visiting ukelele band who stumbled on us and joined in with great gusto  ;D 
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Nick Collis Bird

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Re: Friendly sessions
« Reply #7 on: February 05, 2013, 02:39:25 PM »



Treat going to a session as you would any other social occasion where you are a stranger and you will more than likely get on.   Don't just go to a new session and start playing straight off. Take time to speak to the people there, listen to the conversation, listen to the music and get a feel for how things are.  If you get the feeling that it's like the ones that Bob has described, then it's usually best just to leave and do something else!   But mostly if you engage with the people first you will get on well.
[/quote]

Aha, aha, we have an etiquette question here. I so much agree with Theo's comments.  Having some strange character leap into the middle of your Morris group while you are in the middle of a set is bound to put backs up.
I'll always remember at various Morris gatherings that at the beginning  eg a Friday night everyone viewing the "others" with suspicion. By Saturday night  every one loving each other and making lifelong friends.
If you want to play with a different team to your own, then ASK.  Almost invariably  the answer will be yes! But don't assume.
  Many times at open sessions there will be singers versus musicians, which to my mind is sad. The person in charge, if there is one should be able to sort this out.
Another point. Massed bands. If there are several Morris teams and their musicians all play together , it's a natural tendency to all try to outplay each other. ( remember the three Tenors? Embarrassing )
   The answer is to select a leader and follow him/her.  Works a treat and everybody remains friends, allegedly ! However, there is no accounting for the Hitler types and that session is best left alone.
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Mike Hirst

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Re: Friendly sessions
« Reply #8 on: February 05, 2013, 03:01:32 PM »

Friendliness and music are not always necessary bedfellows. I can think of several people who's characters I absolutely loath. Despite this fact they will always be pleased to play with me, as they value the quality of music we play together. Music can transcend many barriers. I recall one particularly nasty argument I had with a long term musician friend. We played a session that night, both wishing that the other person was dead. A woman burst into tears saying that the beauty and tenderness of the music we made was more powerful than anything she had ever heard before. Later the night descended into ugliness, violence and self loathing. We have only spoken once in the 25 years that have passed.
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Nick Collis Bird

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Re: Friendly sessions
« Reply #9 on: February 05, 2013, 03:34:35 PM »

Mike, you are not alone,
Want to go down the Pink Floyd road? Or even getting rid of Pete Best from the Beatles.
Music is an emotion, mix that with Human Beings and what a stew you get.
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911377brian

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Re: Friendly sessions
« Reply #10 on: February 05, 2013, 07:49:29 PM »

And there's me trying to pluck up the courage to go  the session at South Zeal [West Devon]. Not sure I've got the balls for it now... :-\
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Theo

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Re: Friendly sessions
« Reply #11 on: February 05, 2013, 08:11:02 PM »

And there's me trying to pluck up the courage to go  the session at South Zeal [West Devon]. Not sure I've got the balls for it now... :-\

Just go and listen, talk to the players, make friends.   ;)
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Theo Gibb - Gateshead UK

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sqwzboxstudent

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Re: Friendly sessions
« Reply #12 on: February 05, 2013, 08:36:58 PM »

Brian, although i havnt been to that session (the one in the kings arms , run by mark bazeley?), i know many of the regulars, im  sure you would be very welcome
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malcolmbebb

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Re: Friendly sessions
« Reply #13 on: February 05, 2013, 08:44:31 PM »

Brian, I don't know Mark Bazeley well but our paths have crossed from time to time. I'd be very inclined to agree with Tommy.
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911377brian

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Re: Friendly sessions
« Reply #14 on: February 05, 2013, 09:24:15 PM »

I feel better already... ;D :|glug :||:
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Matthew B

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Re: Friendly sessions
« Reply #15 on: February 06, 2013, 06:53:44 PM »

I'd add on the upbeat side of things that the overwhelming majority of the times when I drop into a session people are very welcoming and seem genuinely pleased to share their music and hear some new tunes.  Since joining melnet I've tended to post a note here when I plan to travel somewhere new.  There is usually a quick reply, some sound advice, and a friendly face, a warm greeting, and a fine evening of music as a result.  This good fellowship can transform the most dreary or challenging (or wonderful) trip into a truly memorable event.  Common courtesy goes a long way.  Buying a round helps as well.
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Re: Friendly sessions
« Reply #16 on: February 06, 2013, 09:54:54 PM »

Be polite and friendly, and most players will return the same.

Just join in with the tunes, and enjoy the ambience.

Don't be afraid to lead a tune yourself, but try a well known one.

Remember that it's a normal human trait to look suspiciously at strangers until you know they are harmless !!

 :D
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YorkieKen

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Re: Friendly sessions
« Reply #17 on: February 06, 2013, 10:57:42 PM »

I have enjoyed reading the comments on this thread, all really make the same point...as a newcomer you should expect to be made welcome BUT don't try to impress by playing flash tunes that nobody else knows, or sit twiddling your thumbs in the corner. The success of a good session is when every one participating gets a 'go' and feels part of it. More experienced players should encourage novices rather than freezing them out. At the end of the session all should leave happy and looking forward to the next one....there is no better adrenalin high than a good sesh! IMO  ;D
Oh....a final word of warning, don't turn up at an Irish session with a Tuba or a Hurdy Gurdy lol  :|glug
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nfldbox

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Re: Friendly sessions
« Reply #18 on: February 07, 2013, 12:05:03 AM »

Just dropping in once and not playing can let you know what's what but not always as most sessions have a strange week or two. This is certainly true in St. John's in the summer when you never know who might come home or who is visiting. But one point is try to find one at the right level for you, besides everything else. Most sessions become uncomfortable when someone is too fast and fancy or too slow and incompetent. There is a range at each session. Everyone is not at the same level but anyone not in that range doesn't feel comfortable.
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Re: Friendly sessions
« Reply #19 on: February 07, 2013, 12:21:34 AM »

Kings Arms at Zeal - lovely pub. Mark Bazeley - lovely man and a humble but brilliant melodeonist.
Jump right in.  (:)







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